This past weekend, I had found a person on Facebook that I had worked with at the computer store a long, long time ago... granted, it's been years, at least 15. So I send a request to be added onto his list... and he sends me a mail back. "Help me remember you." So I described my vitals, blah blah, who I am and how I knew him and all of that...well, apparently he remembered me - but didn't add me to his list, effectively snubbing me.
Now... even just a year ago, this so-called "rejection" would have had me doing the screaming meemies dance. People with depression, remember, don't see the world the same way that you do. I would have taken it as "the end of the world".
Today? Fuck 'em.
That's the thing about Facebook and similar social networking sites... they are so incredibly flawed as to whom to consider "friends". I have 118 people on my contact list, currently. One is family (my cousin). Three are very, very close friends, the best friends I have. Three more are friends that, while not extremely close, are close enough that I would consider a necessity in my life. The rest? Well... how well do I know them, or they me? A good deal of them are from either high school days (where no one knew anyone), or from my various places at work. So... 7 out of 118? See what I mean?
Facebook and the like shouldn't term people as "friends". I, with my social anxiety and depression, do not have anything close to 118 "friends". Maybe six if I'm lucky.
And for people like me - even for people like you, dear Reader - it's misleading. It's insidious, how places like this have taken over the landscape of the Internet, really. I see people at work checking their "eff-bees" constantly... "Oh, what did he say, what does she think?" Does it really matter? Do you have to be "on" 24 hours a day? I would think that would be more exhausting than just unplugging and chilling out, wouldn't you think?
I'm starting to move away from it, just as I have IRC, just as I have WinMX and the BBS scene. I've been there for all of it, and quite honestly... it was good but I wouldn't do it again. What for, when I've seen the best of what each has to offer?
So as far as I'm concerned, people can refuse my "friend" requests all they like - until you've been with me through the worst of times and have put up with me through all of the crap that I've dished out... until you know me as intimately as you know your own family... you're not anywhere close to a true "friend". You're an acquaintance. That's how it is. Stick around and I might be a friend - I'm a pretty open person despite my illness - but one request on a stupid social networking site does not a "friend" make. People wish it was that easy.
Because I'm classy (despite the fact that I say 'fuck' a lot), I won't name said ill-mannered douchebag. But I could.
Rant over.
3 comments:
Well of course I am really nosey and want to know who this douche bag is!!!!!!!! I do agree the term "friend" is a very loose term on FB!!!!!!!!
Friend List should be Aquaintance List. I know on Facebook I have almost my entire graduating class, old friends, old boyfriends, family, etc. I don't stay in constant contact with 1/10th of them, but I do think it's a great way to just check in and see how people are doing.
If they dont' want to be added.. fine. If they don't want to add me.. fine. Very few people have had a life altering affect from finding them on FB or MS, or whatever. I have my handful of great, reliable friends, and the other... just call me nosey! hahaha
Welcome to the real world! I had my fb account permanently deleted several months ago and don't miss it a bit. Out of my 400+ friends only 1 noticed I had gone. Kinda says it all! Hope you're having a good day. :)
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